Why

The story of my life...

... is shit wrapped in shit wrapped in shit...

... sold as gold.

Why

Why... is a contradiction...

Because...

... no one's why is simple or straightforward...

... no one's why sits on the surface...

Is that not what we believe...?

Yet...

*

Ex.

Why did so and so murder so and so?

Because so and so deserved it.

*

But... that is too simple... too straightforward... is it not?

Ex.

Why did so and so murder so and so?

Because so and so's religion glorifies it.

*

Really... because the interior landscape of minds and souls... that lie below the surface... bares why to all... vis a vis religion?

Really?

Ex.

Why did so and so murder so and so?

Because cowardice with opportunity and means... is why wrongdoers wrong.

*

That...

... is intention that truths.

But that...

... is not sufficient... is it?

But that...

... is not motive that satisfies... is it?

Because shit wrapped in shit wrapped in shit... is sold as the gold standard we believe...

As if... the only reality and the only truth... is bullshit...

*

When opportunity... is laid upon a silver platter...

When means... is laid upon a silver platter...

Rightdoers right instead of wrong...

Because truthers 'fore the crossroads... choose faith that truths...

Alas...

When opportunity... is laid upon a silver platter...

When means... is laid upon a silver platter...

Wrongdoers wrong instead of right...

Because parasites don't give a damn...

Postface

The story of my life...

... is shit wrapped in shit wrapped in shit... sold as gold... by never enoughers by wrongdoers by parasites... who don't give a damn...

... that their gravy trains of parasitism are defended and justified by their intentions that lie...

... including that intention that retaliates on behalf of good ol' clubs that eschew accountability and honor and integrity... for round robins of blame and gravy trains of bullshit.

M

Choice

Standing 'fore the crossroads, it spoke:

Choice. 

Choose.

Choice

It paced... uncertain... which choice? how choose?

The other spoke:

Choose.

How do I choose?!

The other unfolded itself, expansive:

Choice. 

Which choice?!

Silent, the other waited.

*

Another spoke:

Both choices are choices. Both choices are free.

What?!

The other spoke:

Listen.

* 

The grandverse is nameless and limitless. 

But your kind... fearful of namelessness and limitlessness beyond your fathom... name and limit that which you set upon to diminish and enslave. In so doing... your kind crown your selves Gods and deem your kind superior to All.

For... far too many of you believe your diminishment and your enslavement of that which is nameless and limitless... is right and just. For... far too many of you believe the lie... that the grandverse belongs to you.

*

It spoke:

Choice. 

Choose.

I choose faith!

Another spoke:

Is your choice the choice to reject namelessness and limitlessness for the Gods of your kind?

What?!

The other spoke:

Listen.

*

The Nameless and The Limitless are not the Gods of your kind. 

For... the Gods of your kind diminish and enslave that which is inviolable for vices great and vices small... including that vice great that demands obeyance to the diminishment and the enslavement of All that which is nameless and limitless.

Every you of your kind who crown your selves Gods and deem you and your kind superior to All... are the you who demand faith untrue. This faith is the choice to reject namelessness and limitlessness for the Gods of your kind. This faith is faith that lies.

*

Without faith, what choice is there?

The other spoke:

That which is nameless, that which is limitless... is nameless and limitless. You who diminish, you who enslave... are no Gods. Such that... faith in such Gods who diminish, faith in such Gods who enslave... is naught but faith that lies.

But the faith I choose is fact!

Another spoke:

No diminishment, no enslavement... of that which is nameless and limitless... is the truth... whether such lie masquerades as fact, whether such lie masquerades as faith. For such diminishment, such enslavement... for vices great and vices small... are lies unworthy of faith that truths.

It spoke:

The faith that truths is a choice as free as the faith that lies. I choose the faith that truths. 

Choice. 

Choose.

More

... faith is not the truth... fact is not the truth... fact is not the lie... faith is not the lie...

... the lie is... that that which is nameless, that that which is limitless... diminished and enslaved for vices great and vices small... is the truth... whether that truth masquerades as fact, whether that truth masquerades as faith... that lie is the lie that we make believe is true... whether we are believers of fact or unbelievers of fact, whether we are believers of faith or unbelievers of faith...

... in the end, the choice is the choice... and that which we choose... is our choice 'fore the crossroads...

M

Parasite

We cannot solve ignorance that we refuse to acknowledge... is a truism of denial that is far too convenient to be true. For is it not true that we deny our ignorance, that we excuse our denial...

... because we don't give a damn?

Parasite

Parasites that don't give a damn destroy their hosts... because their immediate wants, their immediate desires... are pursued at the expense of life itself.

Verily... how is humankind not a parasite?

For are we not destroying our host... for our immediate wants, our immediate desires... at the expense of life itself?

Still... we defend parasitism as defensible... we justify parasitism as just... we sanctify parasitism as sacrosanct...

*

For what else is the satisfaction of our immediate wants, the satisfaction of our immediate desires... at the expense of right... but parasitism?

Still... by perverting facts... by flipping reality into creative fiction... by lying...

... we rationalize parasitism...

... because we only give a damn for our immediate wants, for our immediate desires... no matter the cost.

*

Isn't our parasitism...

... why we exploit... our planet, our atmosphere, our galaxy...?

Isn't our parasitism...

... why we exploit... governments, societies, employers...?

Isn't our parasitism...

... why we exploit... generosity, charity, love...?

Isn't our parasitism...

... why we exploit... fear, vice, hatred...?

*

Because we don't give a damn... our immediate wants, our immediate desires... are all that matters.

If our immediate wants, if our immediate desires... are satisfiable via the catastrophic obliteration of ecosystems, the extermination of the living... for personal vanity, conceit... so be it because that's how we roll. If our immediate wants, if our immediate desires... are acquirable via the duplicitous and treacherous exploitation of our governments, our societies, our employers... more power to us. If our immediate wants, our immediate desires... are achievable via defrauding the generous, the charitable, the loving... fleecing the fearful, the viceful, the hateful... don't hate the player, hate the game.

As if... denying such parasitism and excusing such denial... transforms the fact of such abhorrence and reprehensibility, the reality of such abhorrence and reprehensibility, the truth of such abhorrence and reprehensibility...

Indeed... so long as we only give a damn for our immediate wants, for our immediate desires... no matter the cost...

... we won't give a damn that we are parasites.

Nota Benedicta

We reject the parasitism of parasites on the premise that we reject all parasitism.

But when the parasitism is ours, but when the parasite is us...

... what then?

For... no perversion of facts... no flipping of reality into creative fiction... no lying... alters the fact... that whether we give a damn or not... our parasitism... our sowing wrong... our never enoughing... expose the truth... of the merits of our substance or abominable lack thereof.

M

Et Gratis

Crats accuse nots of parasitism; nots vice versa. For coercion robs nots to gild crats. The powerless accuse the powerful of parasitism; the powerful vice versa. For extortion robs the powerful to appease the powerless. Corporations accuse consumers of parasitism; consumers vice versa. For profiteering robs consumers to bloat corporations. Employees accuse employers of parasitism; employers vice versa. For exploitation robs employers to fatten revolving employees aplenty.

Every hand robs every till because every till shorts every hand... and every till shorts every hand because every hand robs every till...

In ceaseless games of round robin... we evade accountability, we sow wrong, we never enough... because parasites don't give a damn... no matter the cost.

M

Sow Wrong

Everywhere sowing wrong everywhen...

Sow Wrong

Sowing wrong is norme de rigueur.

Because:

     Wrong is norme de rigueur.

*

Ex.

Emaciation is wrong. Its very presentation evokes potently visceral pity. Yet we're inundated with images of emaciation until we fail to recognize emaciation when we see it.

Such that:

The abject visages of the poor in our own backyards inspire no compassion.

The abject visages of the broken beyond our borders inspire no mercy.

Because:

Images of emaciation are sold to us as beautiful. Such that such 'beauty' sells us on excess and extravagance and vanity and conceit.

Why? Because we buy it. We buy the bullshit of the former. Then we buy the bullshit of the latter. Until the poor and the broken are us.

For the excess and the extravagance and the vanity and the conceit we buy bloat the coffers and fuel the gravy trains of never enoughers who sell us bullshit to sell us bullshit.

*

Ex. 

Cheating, faking, scamming are wrongdoing. They entail deception, distortion, deceit with willful and malicious intent to defraud. Yet we're inundated with cheats and fakes and scams until we fail to recognize fraud when we see it.

Such that:

Accountability evasion defends cheating, faking, scamming as 'honest' work and toil.

Accountability evasion justifies deception, distortion, deceit as 'honest' misstep and err.

Accountability evasion legitimizes cheats, fakes, scams as 'honest' ambition and motivation.

Because:

Displays of fraud are sold to us as virtuous. Such that such 'virtue' sells us on acquiring what we haven't earned, earning what we don't deserve, deserving what is not ours.

Why? Because we buy it. We buy the bullshit of the former. Then we buy the bullshit of the latter. So our cheating, our faking, our scamming pave slick roads of collusion that all of us tread to shift blame, pass the buck, retaliate in round after round after round of round robins of blame.

Until the blamed and the targeted and the retaliated against are us. While never enoughers don teflon suits to ensure their immaculate blamelessness as paragons of wrong masquerading as right. While the blamed, the targeted, the retaliated against, the buyers of bullshit hold the whole bill of blame.

*

In other words:

No one is selling what we're not buying and we're buying bullshit like never before. As if bullshit isn't bullshit. As if bullshit is a state of mind, a state of make believe whereby donning rose colored glasses and daubing faerie dust alters facts and mutates reality into that self serving fantasie wherein bills of blame are forsaken as not ours and our wrongs are uplifted as sacrosanct 'virtues'.

Really?

Ex.

Is the wanton destruction of the living breathing planet that supports all life really no one's fault? Because the misappropriation of this planet into our dumping ground is not our fault? Because the conversion of resources on this planet towards our consumption is not our fault? Because the ruthless exploitation of the living breathing planet that supports all life for our personal vanity for our corporate profiteering is not our fault?

Really?

In what where is such bullshit not bullshit?

Ex.

Is accountability evasion really not fraud if the evader is us and our idols and our in the pocket chums and our good ol' clubs and our wants and our desires? Because our work our toil our misstep our err our ambition our motivation, verily our intentions that lie are honest? Because our cheats, our fakes, our scams that rob the rightdoer to preserve and to advance the wrongdoer are virtuous? Because acquiring what we haven't earned, earning what we don't deserve, deserving what is not ours is noble and good and just and right?

Really?

In what when is such bullshit not bullshit?

*

Everywhere wrong is sown is everywhen wrong is triumphant. A fact not alterable by lens. A reality not mutatable by belief. A truth impervious to bullshit.

Note

Sow of Sow Wrong is a deliberate homonym (ex. so, sew, sow, and so on and so forth).

M

Round Robin of Blame

Games of hot potato...

... evolve...

... into pass the buck...

Round Robin of Blame

In childhood, games of hot potato are trivialities pierced by ephemeral sacrifices of social esteem, facilely forgotten by the next round... and the next... and the next...

But...

... rather than set such pastimes aside as games of childhood...

... we transform hot potato into pass the buck...

... whereby lessons of accountability and shame and responsibility and forgiveness are repudiated for calculated malice...

... whereby accountability evasion serves ulterior motives... including retaliation and reprisal.

*

When the blame game is... children who blame invisible ne'er do wells for pilfering cookies tucked into mischievous smiles...

... such games of rogue puerility are innocuous.

But...

... it's hardly the case that such games of childhood arrive untouched and intact into adulthood. For it's far more likely that the insouciant appeal of casting fly lines in the dark...

... pales in comparison to the far more sinister and robust satisfaction of directed blame that exacts intentful retribution. Like stoning two birds with one stone... petty vengeance masquerading as blame shifting... is how never enoughers win game after game after game... of pass the buck.

*

We often dismiss the blame game...

... as normative...

... as expected...

... under the premise that self preservation and self advancement and self conceit...

... are reasonable...

... and harmless.

But...

... is pass the buck... wholly harmless?

When reprisal and retaliation masquerade as reasonable self preservation, harmless self advancement, banal self conceit...

... is such game... wholly absent of malice?

And what of our indifference and our dismissal of such game...

... are we not complicit by our denial of and our apathy to that which is flagrantly abhorrent?

*

Haven't all of us... at one point or another... been subject to being targeted...

Haven't all of us... at one point or another... been subject to directed blame...

... without cause...

... without found...

... without objective veracity...?

And...

... when we ask ourselves... why...

... do we not recognize... the truth in plain sight...

... of calculated harm...

... of intentful malice...

... of petty vengeance unmasked... for the self preservation of someone else... for the self advancement of someone else... for the self conceit of someone else...

... at our expense.

As if...

... our lives are disposable... to never enoughers callously and savagely indifferent to the real lives of real people in the real world.

*

Yet...

... games of blame and pass the buck remain impervious to transparency.

Like corruption and prostitution...

... the economy of shifting blame from where it belongs to where it doesn't... is so robustly insulated, so zealously defended, so extraordinarily profitable...

... who rights instead of wrongs...? Because... rightdoers are as disposable as integrity to wrongdoers exploiting gravy trains of round robins of blame.

Addendum

Of course...

... all the shifting in the world... can't shift blame... to where blame won't stick...

*

Which begs the question...

... if passing the buck isn't effective unless blame sticks...

... doesn't it stand to reason...

... that games of passing the buck... incentivize blame sticking... to include strategies and tactics of deliberate, covert, tacit, etc. deceit and distortion and collusion...?

(Notwithstanding the corollary... that games of passing the buck... also incentivize the preservation of personal teflon by which blame cannot stick to us... regardless of the truth...)

*

What if...

... deceit includes notes and documentation, for example, masquerading as 'objective records' that are beliefs and opinions that are unverifiable by objective facts... that, by no veracity whatsoever, dumbfoundedly satisfy 'cause' for blame shifting...?

... distortion includes reports and assessments, for example, masquerading as 'objective recommendations' that are beliefs and opinions that are unverifiable by objective facts... that, by no veracity whatsoever, dumbfoundedly satisfy 'found' for blame shifting...?

By what justification do we assume the self preserving are absent of deceit, absent of distortion... especially that deceit and that distortion that pave slick paths of accountability evasion for the self preserving...?

By professions? By titles? As if professionals and titlebearers are above mortal sins.

*

What if...

... collusion includes education, training, and knowledge building, for example, masquerading as legitimizations of 'objective accreditations', 'objective certifications', and 'objective licenses' that are manipulated and employed as tools of exploitation, coercion, and extortion...?

By what justification do we assume the self advancing are absent of collusion... especially that collusion that stacks the decks to win game after game after game of pass the buck... whereby accountability evasion serves ulterior motives for the self advancing... including retaliation and reprisal (especially against rightdoers, whistleblowers, truthers)...?

By supervisions of boards? By memberships of associations? By procedures of self policing? As if in the pocket chums of and good ol' clubs of professionals and titlebearers are sacrosanct and above reproach.

*

(Notwithstanding... threats of, fear of, witnessing of, demonstrations of, etc... blatant, implicit, institutional, systemic, etc... directed blame, being targeted, vengeance and retribution... compel wrongdoing and fuel games of passing the buck... because...

... though we dismiss blame games... on the one hand... on the other... we indisputably recognize that rightdoers are expendable... to wrongdoers callously and abhorrently indifferent to the real lives of real people in the real world.)

*

Verily...

... how harmless then...

... how absent of malice then...

... are round robins of blame?

Indeed...

... as harmless...

... as absent of malice...

... as intentions that lie.

M

*

More

In the Era of the Blameless... there are always professions of convenience, titles of convenience... that bestow upon never enoughers, that confer upon wrongdoers... defense, justification, legitimization... of round robins of blame.

Because accountability... that noble virtue to which childhood aspires... is that virtue to which never enoughers of every age, that aspiration to which wrongdoers of every era... are inexorably allergic and savagely averse.

M

To Live and Die by the Sword

... is about accountability.

To Live and Die by the Sword

We live in an age of virtue as ephemeral as pillow talk. Reduced to words no more concrete than spectres that vanish...

... in the face of real life that demands real virtue from real flesh and blood.

In breezy contempt, we reject the honor vaunted by swordbearers who lived and died by their allegiance to soulful faith...

... for the dishonor of faithlessness paid in bloated paydays for do nothings and bonuses of salt for pillow talkers.

Alac! Money can't buy integrity and honesty!

But money buys titles that pretend to both. Facile repudiation of the truth...

... of titlebearers beholden to credos of wormtongues.

Allergic to sacrifice and suffering anemia of nobility...

... wormtongues serve only themselves, advance only themselves, preserve only themselves vis a vis time honored masques of ingratiation and flattery and distortion and deceit.

So timorously we believe we are worthy...

... while in our ear the nothings of do nothings whisper nothing.

So guilefully we believe the lie of make believe...

... while by our side stand titlebearers who testify to honesty and integrity as authentic as charlatans of professionalism, nay convenient victims.

As if titlebearers are swordbearers...

... by self importance.

As if wormtongues are virtuous...

... by self absorption.

Alac! We live in an age of fools!

Flocking to the deceiver, the distorter, the flatterer, the ingratiator...

... prostrating for the dishonor of faithlessness impersonating life and death by the sword... the guileful, the timorous, the we we we.

Nota Benedicta

If one more charlatan of professionalism, nay convenient victim...

... defends uterus and not me... justifies melanin and not me... legitimizes make believe and not the truth... to immure not me... into prisons of sexism, coffins of racism, caves of faithlessness... out of fear, out of greed... 

... there. is. not. joyous. Thundersnow. pure. Aeternitas. that. is. the. whole. of. rage. of. me. of. fate that sees. what lives. what dies. what deserves jus. so help me. myself. sum ergo jus.

M

Addendum

Oh! Retaliation! Arsenal of dishonor!

How transparant the charlatan, the wormtongue

     to live and die by such sword

     whet on collusion.

Oh! Disgrace!

Pity the soul unfound

     for whom disrepute and prostitution

     are intentions that lie.

M

I Am Not

I am not a warrior -

- because I am a woman.

Because being a warrior -

- has nothing to do with whether I was born with a uterus or a prostate.

I am not a champion -

- because I am a person of color.

Because being a champion -

- has nothing to do with whether my skin produces more melanin or less.

I am not a hero -

- because I am a victim.

Because being a hero -

- has nothing to do with whether acts of violence are exacted upon me or not.

I am not -

- because words that divide us -

- because lines that separate us -

- because sides that uplift some of us more equally than others -

- because beliefs that make believe -

- have everything to do with war -

- and -

I am a warrior of war -

- and -

I am a champion of war -

- and -

I am a hero of war -

- because fighting for vivo et liber of all for all -

- because fighting for mutuus et aequum of all for all -

- have everything to do with being a warrior -

- have everything to do with being a champion -

- have everything to do with being a hero -

- and -

I am not.

Postface

I am a fighter who fights for -

- not words that divide us.

- not lines that separate us.

- not sides that uplift some of us more equally than others.

- not beliefs that make believe.

- not.

M

Note

One example of the sheer stupidity of labels that define us is the following:

I am labelled a 'person of color' among those whose skins produce less melanin - and am therefore deserving of less hospitality and kindness by 'persons not of color'. Meanwhile, I am labelled a 'person not of color' among those whose skins produce more melanin - and am therefore deserving of equally less hospitality and kindness by 'persons of color'.

In other words, whether our own skin produces less melanin or more, far too many of us are equal opportunity ists on the basis of the most absurd stupidities, including whether others' melanin are abundant enough to 'belong' or lacking enough to 'belong' to labels that define us by that which is no more than skin deep.

M

Convenient Victim

When you're a victim when it suits you...

your victimhood is nothing more than convenient.

Convenient Victim

When the sun isn't shining...

you're a victim.

When the debt you owe is knocking on your door...

you're a victim.

When you deserve what you haven't earned...

you're a victim.

*

But the sun doesn't shine for you...

it shines for all.

But debt doesn't knock where it isn't accrued...

it knocks where it's sowed by never enoughers.

But reward doesn't materialize from otiosity...

it ensues from toil.

*

Notwithstanding moirai irrespective of whyfors the grandverse over...

convenient victimhood is the fabrication of never enoughers...

who eschew the truth of that which is real...

for manufactured realities that are fake...

including that reality exsiccated of veracity...

that never enoughers are victims.

Addendum

There is the assumption that all victims are equal. Alas, some victims are more equal than others. Which is to say, some victims are not victims at all; other victims surely warrant sympathy but are hardly blameless; rarest of all are victims who merit empathy.

For lost within assumptions, then as now, is the truth:

We fabricate reality until the only reality we believe is make believe.

Still, the truth is the truth irrespective of assumptions that are nothing more than beliefs immersed in faerie dust.

M

Note

Needless to say, though some victims are more equal than others above is a reference to George Orwell's Animal Farm, lessons of faerie tales are no less subject to revisionism á la make believe than reality and the truth.

M