Have you heard the creeping crescendo of alarmism about... loneliness? Not that that's really here or there. Where such 'talk' leads, however... that is here.
Your Number
I'm aware that 'belonging' is a thing. A 'thing' that draws people into groups. That creates 'communities' through 'experiences'. That builds 'identities' around places and rituals and memberships.
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I, nevertheless, do not feel so... inclined. It's not as if a demonstrably 'national' celebration incites in me, a 'belonging' to political borders, for example. I have participated in a share of 'shared experiences', sure. But I can't say that a moment stamps upon me, a genuine connection to every participant who lived and breathed then and there, too. Likewise, so-called 'histories of residence' do not 'root' me indelibly to patches of lithosphere.
Please. I am not one of a number.
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On the other hand, I see you drawn to being one of a number.
Which is to say, I see you fall in. To craft narratives about who should possess power and what power should control. To harness avarice and ambition. To collectively achieve all that's inconceivable. Even if the price of victory is appeasing a wannabe-tyrant by fulfilling a wannabe-tyrant's anti-democracy 'project'.
Which is to say, I see you reach. Beyond death and taxes. For a promise of immaterial glory, never mind a materially plural nation. For a 'plan', never mind a democracy of, for, and by a self-governed people. For a yoke of obedience that disdains self-government and declares an absolute lord dictates justly.
Which is to say, I see you throw yourselves. Into 'fandoms'. Devoted to 'parasocial relationships' with 'public personalities'. Because being a 'follower' means never not loving, never not praising, never not defending your idols, your celebrities, your own.
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Which is to say, this 'belonging' is a 'thing'. A 'thing' that aggregates the eager for 'association'. Fueled by perceived exclusion. To depart reality for
The Land of Feelings are Facts.
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I, to put it simply, don't feel tempted by The Land of Feelings are Facts. Because I'm partial to the truth.
As I see it, the truth doesn't 'make reality' out of fables. It's not a 'main character' and it doesn't exist 'for the plot'. It's not 'making converts' out of audiences yearning to be told what's 'really' happening is what's in fact not happening.
Because the truth isn't about how feelings feel. Or what beliefs are believable.
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On the other hand, I see you defining
what's false as what's true and what's pretend as what's real. To 'belong'. To an imagined 'number'.
This imagined 'number' is vast, consequential, and triumphant. Of course it's invention is to make believers out of audiences that strive to be seen, that crave inclusion.
Without believers, it's invention is nothing but a ridiculous yarn, a tall tale. Of trifling that whinges itself righteous and patriotic. Of greed wearing its self-importance like a crown. Of faith vacated for vague fearsome 'terrors'.
Of 'worlds' upon 'worlds' where humbugs and flimflams are creators, founders, nay, gods. Because what's faked is what's authentic in The Land of Feelings are Facts.
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I mean, sure, 'belonging' is a 'thing'. But what kind of thing does 'belonging' make you a member of? What kind of thing is your number? In other words, what thing are you faithful to and loyal to, when the 'thing' you 'belong' to...
lies?
Epilogue
From your 'purpose' to your 'motives', you are lead not to The Land of the Truth.
After all, the truth is stark.
It knows that lying isn't evidence of greatness and lies aren't wins. That dumpster fires of both 'restore' neither 'images of stature' nor 'economies'. That feeling otherwise and believing otherwise, 'make' neither true.
Yet your number insist that the truth is owned by you and yours. That the truth is within your power and within your control. Because it is inconceivable that
reality happens
without being crafted or designed or plotted.
Which is bananas. What a crafted 'project' or designed 'plan' or plotted 'narrative' is evidence of, is invention. And invented 'reality' by any name is called fiction, still.
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I ask:
if lying isn't evidence of magnificence... and if lies aren't victories... and if dumpster fires of both 'restore' neither 'perceptions' nor 'pocket currencies'...
why testify that feeling otherwise and believing otherwise 'make' both unimpeachable? why traffic in plainly dishonest 'realities'? if not to test
the witness and obedience of audiences owned by main characters, 'public personalities', founders?
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Whatever draws you in, creates 'communities' through 'experiences', builds 'identities' around places and rituals and memberships... whatever sees audiences and includes you... I wonder
if 'belonging' isn't worth what you forswear
to be your number.
M
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Nota Bene
It surprises nobody
that some of you know for sure that defending dumpster fires of lying and lies, is the most courageous act of courage ever; that some of you know for sure that attacking standing in rebuttal and refutation of dumpster fires of lying and lies, is the most courageous act of courage ever.
Because The Land of Feelings are Facts is abundantly populated with believers in imagined 'numbers', faked and owned by main characters, 'public personalities', founders, nay, absolute masters who dictate like overrated inhuman gods.
M
You arrive at a fork in the road in a dark forest with two paths in front of you. Heard this one before? Maybe you should listen a bit more closely then.
ReplyDeleteOne path is well maintained with lights, signs, and messages freely floating over the air – encouraging you to keep walking this path to become one of the numbers. It’s not long before you run into people – all who seem like you, all who make you feel heard, all who tell you that their community is the best way to make everything great again. The farther in you walk, the more the ideas, the thoughts, the words feel right, seem right, and you feel like this is where you belong.
The other path is bumpy, poorly maintained – it’s dark and obviously traveled by few. Whispers of truths float across the air which make you feel scared and bare even as your mind acknowledges that they are reality. You see few on this road, and most are not like you, they seem to be traveling this road by themselves, and you feel like it’s less about being heard and more about hearing here. The farther you walk, the more you realize that it will lead you on a never-ending path of truth, reality, and you will be expected to do something where you might not ever belong.
Which path are you going to take – the one where you belong to something, no matter what that might be; or the one where you belong to nothing but the truth? I took the other path and it’s made all the difference I have ever needed.
There is nothing special about me to most of you, for this I am certain.
ReplyDeleteI appear common and live a small, humble life away from the royalty of my birth.
There will never be a monument, statue, or place dedicated to me.
This name will be forgotten with others raising my thoughts, works, and efforts as their own.
I’ve dedicated myself to less being a number and more being an equation,
My family, soulmates, and friends ask no loyalty or allegiance of me.
They accept my life is dedicated to something that will never make me made.
I am but one, who is two, and the two is more than the one.
There is an amorphous blight of nethermost confusion full of blasphemy, lies, and sanctimony which hitherto existed only on the fringes of the ordered universe that we know as Earthlings. Like all fringes, it quietly bubbles at the center – going back infinitesimal. Few back to antiquity dared to speak the blight’s names in masses as even they were not willing to dare with his gnawing hunger, inconceivable horror that spans beyond time and space, muffled beating of vile drums, and the whine of accursed flutes which drive those that hear it to frenzy, hate, and vileness. Yet, here we are in the age of Technology, where the fascination with greed, power, wealth, community, and numbers have led a growing number of so-called, “Technological Gods,” “Theological Prophets,” and, “Acrisiusian Vanities” move more and more to worship this blight on the universe in their egotistical drive to be more than dust. Careful what you wish for – you might very well get it one day and realize that the problem with numbers and gods is that gods don’t worry about numbers and punish all equally.
ReplyDeleteRelease the Kraken...
DeleteI wonder about you. You who have given us so much through your writing’s past – a plan, a vision yet you push us away. You refuse the greatness we offer, the power that you deserve, the riches that are yours, and the fame others steal from you. All you must do is come to be one of our numbers and embrace the community, yet you continue to choose to be you. You choose to defend people who are not like you, who miscategorized you, and put you down. Please wake up soon, a mind is horrible thing to waste on those that are not deserving.
ReplyDeleteWell spoken friend... I hope this... works well for... you and yours... I suspect that... the pain in... your posterior is... the small foot... driving upwards towards... your heart's beat... But feel safe.... her leg is... not long enough... to get there...
DeleteI think you will be !@#$ing amazed at how far that foot and the !@#$Ing power can drive it.
DeleteCommunities, in the way we are discussing here, seek an order of things where base, cruel, and immoral passions are outlawed and all desires need to merit the greater glory of the religion, the country, and the leaders so that each of the community can enjoy the prosperity and benefits while those outside the community are given their just do.
ReplyDeleteThe community wants to substitute morality for ego, integrity for honor, principles for customs, and sense of loyalty for a sense of right. They value genius for wit, truth for grandeur, happiness for boredom, and greatness over the humble. To get here, sacrifices must be made for the greater good. The republic, the democracy, must be updated to fortify the principles of the community and to elevate its needs over the individuals. Some might call this tyranny but it’s part of the plan to make everything great and therefore is nothing more than liberating people regardless of whether they want to be liberated or not.
Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the poorest feeling for those who walk on two legs with two hands and a brain. They will do anything to lift themselves out of this poverty, selling everything and anything, both owned and not, to get to a state where there are not one of the poor.
ReplyDeleteActors act. CEOs corporate. Singers sing. Influencers influence.
ReplyDeleteThey all make grandiose gestures, donations, and acts to show their community, their stances, and their nobility. I mean they have more money than most will ever see, all from people who actually do work, do right, and try to make a difference.
Why are these people the self-appointed leaders of political, societal, and economic movements? Why do they get to upend the will of the people who have chosen a candidate, a law, or a platform just because they don’t agree with it?
Most of these are not impacted by the same things you are. They live in mansions, they live in other countries, and they live out of touch with the reality of everyone around them.
In the end, why does it matter what they think or say? They are not the truth, they long ago sold that to the highest bidder to enjoy the wealth, fame, power, and reach they have now.
Humans are inherently social and combative creatures. They are openly relational not only in interaction but also in fluidity of nature. This is perhaps why they struggle with the truth. To be human is to be relative, the truth however is not relative.
ReplyDeleteThis is not a new phenomenon; the followers of the truth live in isolation with few relations other than the few like them while the followers of relational experiences and thought live in communities that help them to atomize the truth.
The truths of the community are the same now as then – men in prison are criminals, single parent families rob children of morality and happiness, welfare is for the lazy, and lack of religion in all aspects of life and thought make for a lack of morality and extravagant vice. It goes without saying that there are other narratives that promote one community as the only way and the only way to be pure is to forsake other communities.
I age. It's not been a graceful aging. My body is a pale comparison to what it was, even though I dare say I am still quite capable despite the creaks and pains. Words don't come to me like they used to but I am still open, thoughtful, and willing to listen. I want to do good still and am not willing to give up the fight just yet. All I ask of you all is to be fair to me in my old age, to compare me not to the young but to the other old people. And to compare me fairly against others. A slip of word is far less worse than a lie. A rambling of a point is far better than not answering the question at all. All I ask...
ReplyDeleteVicarious Redemption is not a new problem and whether it happened ages ago or today – it’s still repulsive. Even more so, when you apply faithless rhetoric passing as religious teachings or thoughts, as if you can con your way into heaven by doing all the sins in the here and now and then act faithful at the pearly gates. I mean, seriously, you can’t throw your sins onto another and expect them to pass from you to them as easily as expelling air from your lungs. There are whole systems created now for the modern evangelical movement to absolve, forgive, and scapegoat. It’s immoral to the core regardless of the BS reason that you give.
ReplyDeleteIn your zeal to escape the guilt of what you and your community do, you fail to notice that the line between evil and apathy becomes one.
ReplyDeleteI yearn for the day when one could load the sins of the community on to the back of a goat, drive it out of the city, and everyone was cleansed of the wrongdoing until a few days later when you had to drive another goat out of the city. Now, we do the same except it’s no longer the goat – it’s another person or a group of people or a community that gets the sins strapped to its back and sent on their way. It’s always amazing how purgation becomes a purge.
ReplyDeleteI was surrounded by a group of NotSees yesterday. They demanded me to tell them who made America Not Great Again. I’m not stupid, I know what they wanted. I said, “Me and mine,” and then quickly added, “and so did the elephants.” They were confused. “Why the Elephants,” they asked. I countered with, “Why Me and Mine?” I have not seen them since.
ReplyDeleteIn the end I yearn for a day and a place where society will open its eyes and see that what we are doing affects the ones with the least power and say while the ones with the most power and say gain more control and reap the benefits of the dividends that they receive as their work goes unchallenged.
ReplyDeleteThe clock will strike midnight at some point in our time, the masks will come off, and you will realize that the community that you thought you had was nothing but a mirage.
ReplyDeleteNeither yours or you fully understand the depth of loneliness that others feel without communities that bring them together and purpose as you have no feelings, instead opting to be all about facts. Facts and truths, except for you, don't make someone feel loved.
ReplyDelete